Wednesday, July 04, 2007

The crazy pranks of Brock U's Queenston Rez

I wasn't a bad prankster, certainly compared to the guys upstairs in Doherty hall. I gave a few cold shower surprises, taking a glass of ice cold water from my refrigerator, lifting it over the shower curtain and dropping it onto unsuspecting buddies.
Fortunately, our hall got along with the trouble makers from Doherty, who pulled countless fire alarms in the middle of the night. Yeah, that pissed me off. They also like to do tippers, who someone described as garbage pails full of water leaning against the elevator door. Ninth floor, bzzz ding - all over the floor and into the neighbouring rooms. Except there's something else - that wasn't water!

Something fishy is up?
The stinky surprise placed in the ceiling on the ninth floor. These guys really didn't like that floor. An exterminator had to be called before they tracked the stench and disposed of the offending fishy substance.

We had a few clowns on my second year in Queenston.
The secret Santa gift exchange might have been the worst.
One of the naughtier boys on the floor ended up drawing Mr Bondy. An older, married student who wasn't well liked. He creeped out some of the girls. The secret Santa gifts to Mr. Bondy began with a porno of enormous fat-chicks, followed by a big dildo, a bag of dog poop and more unpleasant surprises, all marked - Fuck you from secret santa.
Bong the Banger.
A Korean exchange student, a rake-thin pimply girl, lived next door to me at the very beginning of my second year at Queenston. Her parents visited her the first week, and I recall them screaming at the dons and resident head for placing their lil' princess on a coed floor. She was soon moved to an all-girls floor.
That didn't stop lil princess from visiting Bong, the Korean exchange student who remained on our floor. A few weeks later, and for the remainder of the year, one could hear her moaning and screaming, as good ol' Bong lived up to his name.
One day, ol' Bong was banging, much to his neighbours chigrin. Walls were thin in Queenston, and the voice of a screaming sex-crazed Korean girl could be heard bouncing echoing like an amphitheater.
One day, one of the naughty boys passed by and heard the pleasure-driven screaming. Naugty boy summoned his buddies, and all together they hammered their fists on the door and interrupted Bong's bang. "Way to go Bong, Way to go Bong, Way to go Bong, Yeaaaah Bongster."

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