Toronto's mayor! Toronto's mayor!
The giant, greedy, drug-addled player!
How long can we allow this joke,
To gorge and guzzle, snort and smoke.
On fast food, booze, and crack pipes too.
Disgusting! It simply cannot do!
Why does T.O allow this pig,
To lie and threaten, and grow so big?
A slummed up, flop-house, crack vacation,
A City Hall romp of intoxication.
Threats to kill and poke out eyes.
Growing ever bigger in the thighs!
The horny, greasy, women's bottom feeler,
Was once his high-school's main drug dealer!
This giant, lying sloth of a slug,
A wife-beating, drunken, low-life thug,
He drinks and drives and once got caught.
When asked about it, lied on the spot.
Caught in Florida way down south.
Refused a sample from his big, loud mouth.
As mayor, his first big, two-faced act,
Needed heartless, cruel, plain-spoken tact.
Mourning those gunned down at the mall.
The big fat liar, he stood up tall,
Shoulder to shoulder with Toronto's top cop,
Said this gang violence, it must stop.
How low, I wonder, can he stoop.
The lying, cheating nincompoop.
Than to know, buy from, befriend and hang,
With the same drug-dealing Somali gang!
Caught on video, the Star did report.
With threats of violence he tried to extort.
Through his good friend and pal, tried, true and tested.
His drug-dealing driver who's now arrested.
Now Ford defends from his final bastion.
I sure do miss ol' Mayor Mel Lastman!